Polish Wedding Traditions X - Welcoming with bread and salt.

In the Polish tradition, not only we greet bride and groom right after they walk out of church but also when they enter the reception site. The history behind it is, that newly weds after the ceremony had an elaborate party waiting for them in groom's house. That's where both of the families had a chance to welcome the newly married couple for the first time in their family house. The welcoming greeting was done by parents right in front of the house or in the doorstep. It was done in symbol of good wealth and peaceful intentions directed towards the new family.

 

Today, often owner or the manager of the venue assist in welcoming as well. 

Mothers usually are holding bread and salt. Fathers two glasses, one with water one with wodka. First, bride is asked by her mother which one will she choose. Bread, salt or the groom?The correct answer is, the groom so he will work for the bread and salt. Then mothers wish the wealth to both of the groom and bride and the couple rips a piece of bread off and eats it together with salt. Right after bride picks first which one of the two glasses she wants to drink out of. (Of course it is impossible to tell which one has wodka and which one has water). Whichever one of the two gets wodka, it symbolizes that this will be the dominant person in their marriage. After couple is done with their drinks, the glasses are supposed to be thrown behind them. In order to have good luck in marriage they have to break! At that moment, usually bride and groom kiss their parents and enter either the house or the reception site.

 

Polish Wedding Traditions IX - Greetings!

Polish people are antsy! Right after church ceremony, guests are expecting to congratulate bride and groom.  In Polish tradition, we bring flowers and gifts to the church just to honor that special moment. Usually, you will see a large crowd surrounding bride and groom while their witnesses are trying to hold on to bunches of flowers that couple just received. It takes quite a bit of time for everybody to say at least few words to the newly married couple but it is part of the Polish tradition. In a modern world, especially living in United States while it is a really pleasant moment, we tend to greet with everyone later at the time of the reception. Unfortunately, time is money and there isn't all that much time between church and reception if we are paying big dollars for our gorgeous photographs. 

Congratulations = Gratulacje (gr'at'ool'atsy'e)

Photos above are taken by Michal from Rumia and Krzysztof from Miedzychod. 

Polish Wedding Traditions VIII - Make it Rain!

For some reason one of my favorite parts of the wedding has always been the moment where the bride and groom walk out of the Church after the ceremony is over. There is many special ways in which we glorify this moment but there is one specific one that we stick to in Polish culture. Instead of having guests throwing rice or petals in the air, Polish guests throw money! (Let me just clarify that they are smaller coins, that aren't the size of American quarters). It is done in a symbol of financial luck. As crazy as it sounds it is a very neat idea, mostly because a lot of churches do not allow on throwing rice or petals because they have to clean them up. In Polish tradition the coins that are thrown into the air are to be collected by the newly married couple, of course helpers are allowed and usually, they happen to be flower girls or ring bears. 

Did (or will) you have guests shower you and your new spouse at some point on your wedding day? What unique items have you seen used in a grand exit toss?

Polish Wedding Traditions VI - Picking a Wedding Date

I posted already months that are traditionally in Polish culture, preferred for weddings. Let me cover now a little bit about day of the week in which the marriage and wedding will take place because they have specific meanings as well. 

Monday (Poniedziałek - p'ony'ej'aw'ek) - it is believed to bring to couple health. 

Tuesday (Wtorek - ft'or'ek) - couples married on that day of the week will be wealthy.

Wednesday (środa - shr'od'a) - brings general luck in life.

Thursday (Czwartek - chv'art'ek) - financial trouble.

Friday (Piątek - p'eeo(n)t'ek) - worries and pain.

Saturday (Sobota - s'ob'ot'a)- general happiness with a little bit of trouble here and there.

Sunday (Niedziela - ny'ej'el'a) - happiness in marriage. 

I have no idea how much of this is really true. What I know is that I have never been, or done a Polish wedding on a Friday. 

Above photographs are taken by Studio UPHO. 

Polish Wedding Traditions V - Invitations

Inviting guests for a Polish wedding in a traditional way might not be the simplest task to do. Usually, the importance of quests attending, plays a role in how they are being invited. Today, those guests that are expected to show up including relatives, your closest friends and your parents closest friends are invited by hand delivered invitations. In past that invitation was not only hand delivered to every guest but was brought with additions of baked goods, such as cakes, cookies and other pastries. By receiving extra delicious gift, invited guests could not refuse attendance!

Above are detail shots from our wedding invites. I created a design based on traditional Polish folk art. For those that are having a hard time figuring out what it is, it is two doves facing each other and between them there is a heart. That design was debossed and right below it we placed a Polish quote from a well known Polish writer, Adam Mickewicz. Invitations were written all in English, as in most of our guests were English speaking. At the bottom of the invite there was the family crest of the family that I was marring into. Text was embossed and had a layer of gloss on it. I am not sure if you can see it on the pictures but you could really feel it when you had the invite in  your hands. We did hand deliver quite a few of them, I did spare the baking. 

Polish Wedding Traditions IV - Shoes

This is kind of a funny subject. Because apparently in Polish tradition bridal shoes really matter. The story says, that you can't have open toe shoes for your wedding day because your wealth and money will fly right thru them. My family was really concerned about me having my shoes closed toe. Ladies, you have no idea how hard it is to find good looking white or ivory shoes with closed toes. Not to mention comfortable ones! 

Good thing, the trend is that wearing bridal shoes of different colors is now in fashion, that makes the shopping a lot more easier. 

Regardless, of what you do prepare yourself for the worst for your wedding day and grab an extra pair of hills for your wedding. Polish weddings have always a lot of dancing and having your feet hurting will make things a lot more difficult. 

Above pictures are taken by Maciej from Gdansk. 

Also remember your fiance should not buy or give you money to purchase your bridal shoes, if he does that symbolizes that one day you just might walk away from him!

Above pictures are taken by Joanna & Miroslaw from Cieszyn.

 

Above pictures are taken by Maciej from Mielc. 

Polish Wedding Traditions III - Polish Witnesses = Small Bridal Party

Witnesses are very important when it comes to Polish Weddings. They show up both at the church and civil ceremony. Just as it is in US both of them are usually best friends or family members of the bride and/or groom. There are few responsibilities that witnesses need to fulfill. They need to organize bachelor/bachelorette party, help in preparations for the wedding, take care of wedding bands before the ceremony, help receive flowers and gifts from guests, take active role during oczepiny*, prepare toasts and make sure everyone is having a good time at the time of the wedding. 

In Polish tradition there has never been brides maids or grooms men however, more and more often, influenced by Western culture we can see wedding party growing in size. 

Swiadkowie = Witnesses

*Oczepiny = Midnight tradition, similar to throwing bridal bouquet or bow tie etc. (more details coming soon)

The above pictures are taken by Wojciech from Warszawa. 

My personal opinion is that having a huge bridal party is inconvenient for everyone. If you ever stood up in a wedding you know you pay quite a bit for this honor. I know people who stand up 3 or 4 times a year in a different weddings and it adds up for them really quickly. Also, it isn't hard to pick a best friend, but it is hard to narrow down to 3 or 4 friends or family members because you just might offend somebody.

It is nice however, to let your friends know you need them. And during a wedding there is plenty to do. Pick out responsibilities for them so they feel wanted and needed. It will also give you time to spend together. Remember just because they are not wearing the same dresses or tuxes it doesn't mean they can't be  included in your wedding pictures! 

The above pictures are taken by Pawel from Szubin. 

The above pictures are taken by Igor from Bialystok. 

The above pictures are taken by Adam from Kielce.

Polish Wedding Traditions II - Picking a Wedding Month

In past, picking the date for the wedding was done on the night of the engagement. It was a process where entire family was involved. I wish things were that simple today. Between arranging availability of all your vendors it becomes quite a headache. Traditionally, in Poland even today couples pick their wedding date based on the months that have a letter "R" in their spelling. It is suppose to bring good luck. 

Here is a list of months. 

Styczen = January

Luty = February 

Marzec = March

Kwiecien = April

Maj = Maj

Czerwiec = June

Lipiec = July

Sierpien = August

Wrzesien = September

Pazdziernik = October

Listopad = November

Grudzien = December

June, August and September are always the most popular. 

Of course you can put a twist on this tradition and pick a month that has a letter "R" in English spelling. I am sure that would be also fine. Based on this idea, May and July seem to be the least lucky. 

Above photo was taken by Krzysztof from Myslenice. 

Polish Wedding Traditions I - Polish Engagement

Today, we are quite distant from life that our ancestors had in Poland. It is quite interesting to hear, that for those that lived in villages there was pre-engagement period that took time before the official engagement. Often, families that had children that were ready for marriage, painted their house window shades and frames around windows with blue paint. That way everyone in the village would know that the family wants to give their son or daughter away. Since there wasn't any match maker other than your family and closest friends, it didn't seem that bad of an idea to meet a couple available strangers. 

Engagement itself was a very official, joyful event that let both families to meet each other closer. Man always came to the house were the woman lived with her family. He was accompanied by his family, closest friends and musicians. In past he used to bring bread, salt and vodka to show his respects and also show the bride's family that he will be a good provider for his future family. Before the ring became standard, both woman's and man's hands were placed on the bread and father of the bride gave young couple a blessing for their future life together. Later on in history, just as today, the future husband had a ring that was presented to his future bride. The ring was blessed by witnesses or father of the bride before it was put on his fiance's finger, that way young engaged couple was supposed to have a better luck in their future. The ring was supposed to be made out of high quality metal, as gold or platinum. Silver wouldn't be good enough and it was questioned by the bride's family. The only stone that was accepted was a diamond. Pearls always meant tears and worries. If the requirements were met, good ring was symbolizing the long lasting of the relationship. After the couple made promises to each other, family discussed details and the rest of people celebrated. If the engagement was broken (and it needed to be a reason that was commonly accepted), the ring was always kept by a woman. Taking the ring back meant bad luck for the man. 

Today, obviously those traditions are not as celebrated as they once were. However it is well accepted by the family of the bride, if a man asks her family for her hand before he actually makes the official engagement to the woman herself. That way he shows his respects and makes sure that he is welcomed by her family. It is also not uncommon for the official engagement to take place in in a presence of entire family. Boys one advice to you - don't be strangers when you're marring into a Polish family! 

Picture of the bread is taken by Foto Stryjowski.